About

Marius - politics …

As a political reporter, you don’t often feel sympathy for politicians and their recurring complaints that they being misrepresented.

Politicians spend so much of their time fudging, spinning and generally manipulating the information flow to their perceived advantage that they pretty much deserve what they get when things don’t come out as they intend.

A little “blowback” is only fair.

But I did feel a little sneaking sympathy for the Defence Minister, John Faulkner, over recent weeks.

Last month, he was asked the question all defence ministers are asked any time there is a lull in the conversation: “How long will Australia stay in Afghanistan?”

This time, it was in Parliamentary hearing and John Faulkner took a deep breath and rolled into the stock standard answer which is roughly……”I don’t know how many times I’ve said this, but it is my firm intention to have the troops there not a day longer than we have to.”

A quiet day and a journo or two in need of a lead promoted that into a ground-breaking commitment to an early withdrawal from Afghanistan.

This then followed the Minister across the world and he had to explain from Canberra to a NATO ministers meeting in Bratislava that - No, Australia was not changing its policy. There were no plans for an early exit.

It was a nuisance for the Minister, but then again all those years in a profession where ducking and weaving with the truth is the norm could see it as a self-inflicted injury.

Australia has variously been told it has troops fighting in Afghanistan to establish democracy in that country, free it from the Taliban, bring western values, prevent a repetition of the Bali bombing, train local military until they are able to “do the job themselves”, fulfil our treaty obligations with the United States and more broadly, pay our defence insurance dues to our “great and powerful” friend.

We have also been told that not only are our forces doing a good job, but they are succeeding and there is even at times talk of “victory.”

Experts on that part of the world take a different view, overwhelmingly dismissing any talk of “victory” and saying that even a more limited success would require a minimum doubling of international forces.

Afghanistan is a swamp of half-truths and lies and the Defence Minister can’t be surprised if he finds himself a victim at times.

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Glen - Presenter …

Being a complete sucker for music documentaries, especially those that give you a peak backstage and into the production or rehearsal process of a band or artist, I was one of those keen to see the Michael Jackson film “This Is It” . With the promise of a state of the art concert production that includes extravagant short film backdrops for some songs, wild pyrotechnics and a fabulous light show, it was always a film best seen on the big screen.

The hype in the US when it was launched two weeks ago was immense, but I had other distractions at the time and may have missed my chance if I wasn’t prompted by a friend in Melbourne.
She said it was a ‘must see’ and that after you got past his freaky appearance, you settled back and enjoyed an insight into the artistic process behind one of the world’s great entertainers.

I may not have used those words before seeing the film, but having witnessed the combined vocal, musical, and choreographical skills of the man, it’s hard not be impressed. He was simply one of the best at combining those arts into a compelling mixture that still managed to excite right to the very end. He’s completely engaged in the process - politely coaching vocalists, correcting musicians and changing dance routines - and finds it hard to refrain from giving his all even while trying to rest his voice for the coming gruelling concert season.

It’s an ‘Elvis On Tour’ doco for this generation. One that does recalibrate the man as a rare artist who was about to give the world one of the great rock shows of all time. Away from the hype, the weirdness, and the entourage he emerges as a man ready to silence critics and exhaust fans with a performance that soars thanks to a fantastic band and staggering production values. It’s only near the end that you realise that it isn’t going to culminate- as these films often do - with some of the real concert, a slice of the end result of all this hard work that would take your breath away.
But it doesn’t come - can’t come. And you have to wonder about the effect on all those so caught up in helping him create what was going to be a once in a lifetime production. What a shock . What a loss.

Don’t let anyone tell you he wasn’t fit or up to it.
Thank God he filmed it all, because we mightn’t see its like again.

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Debbie - Sport …

You can file it in the “Could’ve been more Appropriately Phrased” category. Yes, I called Tiger Woods “the great white hope” for Australian golf on air this morning — and I need to tell you Glen Bartholomew very nearly fell off his chair in response. All I can say in my defence is that sporting clichés are colour blind!

The point I was making at the time stands, even if it was perhaps lost in your “What did she just say!!!?” reactions.

Australian golf has struggled for sponsorship and media attention in recent years and bringing Tiger to our shores has given the game more coverage than it’s had in a long time. Except when it comes to the actual tournament.

How wacky is it that, after a whole week of wall-to-wall Tiger, that when he actually plays in the first round of it’s, ahem, a media blackout?

Woods is playing in a morning group today and the television coverage, on both free-to-air and pay-tv, starts five hours after his tee-time. So unless you’re actually at Kingston Heath, you’re not going to see him play on day one.

What a wasted opportunity for Australian golf!

And while Glen and I were talking about the absence of Tiger from the TV we were able to look up and watch tennis’s answer to Tiger, Roger Federer, live on our screens from the Paris Masters.

To compound matters, following the un-televised action from the Australian Masters was not possible on the official website of the tournament. Early this morning, there was a notice on the tournament home page (http://www.australianmasters.com.au/) saying the leader board would be “live” from 7am.

Shortly after 7am, that section of the page went blank and by the time of writing (at 9am) there was an announcement where the leader board should be saying “Service Unavailable”.

Sigh. Somebody needs a boot up the backside. I’d do it, but I’m still trying to get my foot out of my mouth right now.

By the way, frustrated fans wanting to follow the scores online can get them at the Australian PGA website (http://www.pgatour.com.au/).

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Mark - EP …

My kids are 5, 8 & 11. They’re a boisterous lot and with kindy, school, various after school activities and general sibling arguments, they’re busy, busy and busy.

It’s usually hard to get the attention of all three at once for more than a nano-second….especially on Wednesdays, when dinner is usually a15-minute affair sandwiched between picking my son up from swimming and dropping him at Scouts.

But I did manage yesterday.

“Peter Garrett……” , I began.

“The Federal Environment Minister?” interrupted my son. (He knows about Peter Garrett because his Grade 6 class has been doing a unit on Parliament)

“Peter Garrett today said a planned dam in Queensland could not go ahead…”

(My 5 year old interjected at this stage, complaining that she didn’t like her dinner)

“…..because a number of endangered animals live in the valley near Noosa where the dam was going to be.”

(My 8 year old rolled her eyes; she was bored already)

“One was a lungfish….not unlike some of the fish around in the time of the DINOSAURS.” (my emphasis)

The deliberate use of the word “dinosaurs” prompted a bit more interest.

“What’s a lungfish?”

(Lengthy explanation.)

“I really hate this dinner. ”

“Stop hitting me!”

“I am NOT hitting you.”

“Pass the butter.”

“What’s the time? Where’s my Scout shirt?”

I ignored all these interruptions.

“The other animal was….”

“Dad! Mia’s hitting me again!”

“…a turtle who breathes through its BOTTOM.”

Instant silence. Forks poised in mid-air. Alleged sibling assault forgotten.
“What did you just say?”

“A turtle that breathes through it’s bottom”, I repeated with great satisfaction, having confirmed my suspicion that this killer fact would finally get their full attention.

(Much sniggering and guffawing later….)

“How does THAT work?”

There’s actually a very good anatomical explanation in this morning’s “Australian” newspaper of the respiratory system of the Mary River turtle:

“…has the extraordinary ability to absorb oxygen when underwater through gill-like structures near its cloaca (posterior)…..”

The Oz’s senior Queensland writer Andrew Fraser knows a good top-line when he sees one too:

“The needs of a turtle that breathes through its bottom have been put ahead of the needs of more than four million people who will live in southeast Queensland within 20 years”, he rages in his column this morning.

Meanwhile, I’m now under extreme pressure to come up with another bottom reference to the news for my most ferocious critics….